8) The looks from couples as I walk down the street alone
Do guys get looked at like they must be defective in some way when they walk down the street alone on Valentine's Day? Is it really so terrible to be independent? I thoroughly enjoy not having to generate chit-chat about pop culture solely for the sake of producing continuous sounds, so as not to eat in silence.
7) The cost
Let's be real. A lot of journalists would probably qualify for food stamps if we could swallow our pride and apply for them. Our nomadic sense of adventure is often indulged by those who want us to eloquently articulate their activities, so we get into a lot of stuff for free. But that's just free stuff for one. And maybe a camera guy. Getting into a four-course dinner at a fancy French restaurant with a date is probably out of the question.
6) The mating calls
Is it me, or do all the old lovers come out of the woodwork on Valentine's Day? My phone has been blowing up like it's a speaker in a Ke$ha video.
5) The underwear
Who the hell deemed lace sexy?
4) Crowds
All the good places to eat are going to be crowded with people desperate to get their partner intoxicated so they can increase their odds of getting a shot at doing the humpty dance. I'm never going to get a table on Valentine's Day, unless I reserve it a week in advance. On top of that, pun unintentional, even if you don't go to restaurants, the lines at the grocery stores are horrendous in the three days leading up to V Day. You can't get to where you need to go inside the store, because the line for the florist snakes back to the frozen food section, and everyone HAS to have a cart. A friend of mine once climbed over a display of chocolate to circumvent the crowd and get to the deli.
3) Chocolate
I'm lactose intolerant—plus, chocolate has a billion calories that I feel I have to burn off on the treadmill later. Oh yea, and then there's the whole .
2) The implication that a bonded pair > than a single free radical
1) The sense of obligation
Whether you're in a relationship or not, there's a feeling of societal pressure that begins to rain from the word clouds the week before Valentine's Day. Where to eat? Who to ask out? Do you have someone to ask out? Hallmark forbid that you spend the day alone packing for a business trip to New York, or doing something else that might contribute to society in a meaningful way, or just going to a beach and throwing rocks at the ocean. Yea, that's what I'll do tonight. My Valentine's Day is going to rock.
